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The pond plants are beginning to bloom....and our resident garden cat, Loki, loves to watch the fish in the little pond on the patio....not sure how the fish feel about that....speaking of ponds, the hole has been dug for the new pond.  By a big digging machine.  All I had to do was watch and give a few orders....easy peasy.  Nice.  Trying to be very patient, because I need some help with the next step...it involves fine tuning the shape and contour of the big hole, and doing some plumbing sort of stuff....perhaps this weekend????

I've been doing lots of painting and a fair amount of sewing this summer. The sewing is about getting ready for my booth at Venetian Fest in August. This is a wonderful event and was a great money maker for me last year....here's to trusting that this year will be more of the same. The painting is really about joy...and thankfulness. I can draw and paint again.  Come September, I will be creating another website-to showcase my fine art, and there will be a blog that goes along with it. I will probably post there once a week or so, and will either be telling the stories that go with the paintings and drawings, or sharing a bit of my creative process.  As with everything, it depends on how much I have going on....

I've wanted to write about today's subject for a while now.  Trusting in what's good.  I can painfully recall a time a couple years ago, when my neck and shoulder were so messed up and I was in so much pain, that I put my pencil down.  I thought I'd take a rest for a couple weeks or month....this turned into a couple years.  I wondered if I would ever work again-seriously.  Here I am, working. I will always need to practice self care and listen to my body-if I had done this to begin with, instead of popping ibuprofen, I would not have been in such bad shape....I digress. 

The thing is, it was awful to not be able to work with my hands, but I made up my mind that I would one day.  Somewhere inside me, I believed in what was Good, and trusted that.  Suffice it to say, being able to work again feels like a miracle. Earlier today, I submitted my entry for a high caliber jury show. I have had work accepted into this show in the past.  Whether or not I am accepted this year or not is not really the point ( I won't lie-getting in would be great), but beyond that, if felt so damned good to have work worthy to enter!

I am learning this lesson is other ways-my father has had Parkinson's for almost 20 years.  The disease has become very advanced-scary-hard-how should we deal with this?  Mom and dad have a bit of a nest egg, but if dad has to go to the nursing home, it would be gone in a flash...besides going to the nursing home would literally kill my dad.  No way. What to do? 

I am one of five children, the oldest, in fact.  My response is to jump up and take charge and fix things, figure it out, you know, take care of it! This is a non fixable sort of deal-it's complicated.  My brother is a banker, he worries about the money part of things, "what is all this home care going to cost, can mom and dad afford it?"  My sister the nurse, thinks about all the Awful Things that could happen, because she's seen it in other people's lives.  Another sister ended up being the Voice of Reason...... The youngest, another brother, has 10 kids...he cares about mom and dad, but is really exempt from worrying about them-he has all those small people to worry about...

My Voice of Reason sister was the quiet one growing up. She got overlooked.  She has said she often felt invisible....she grew to be a gentle, compassionate, and very powerful woman...visible in a way that shimmers with goodness and bright light.

In the midst of my "We Have To Do Something Frenzy, she gently said to me, "we are going to trust".  Trust in what is Good. Trust that mom and dad will be taken care of-that there is a way through this, where dad can stay at home and be happy-where mom and dad can be together ...We are simply going to trust.  I needed to hear that.  She is a pastor and used to be a hospital chaplain-she's very good a what she does:) Like I said, she is powerful.

My dad is doing well. The nurse sister got him hooked up with Hospice. They take such good care of dad.  There is a woman  mom has hired privately, who loves both my parents and goes out of her way to help them.   Mom and dad are both happy and feel very supported. Dad is feeling better these days thanks to all the good care....

I think we will continue to simply trust in the Good. For me that's God.  He is awfully, awfully good, even when things around us don't look so awfully good.

 


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